Aren’t You Scared?

This is by far the most common question I get asked by locals and friends from home when I’m traveling on my own. My question to them is “Of what? Meeting people like you?”. That question alone will make people stop and think, hmmm… “that’s not what I was thinking”.

No, that’s not what people are thinking when they think of a single woman traveling around foreign countries on her own. Unfortunately, our imaginations have gotten the best of us from movies, TV and news sources that we watch about the safety of the world. Fortunately, there are people just like you and me all over the world! People who enjoy meeting new people, learning about where they’re from, what kind of activities they enjoy, what their family is like, what kind of food they crave, what kind of career they have (or left behind). They’re social and inquisitive, kind and generous. They say Hello! How are you? It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it? Have a nice day! Thank you. You’re welcome. All the same pleasantries that we appreciate from our own homeland. As an American, I know that our culture can be considered “over the top” with our niceties in comparison to other cultures but I believe the foundation of connecting with people is the same, in the appropriate way.

Follow along as I go through some of the things that help me to feel more comfortable when traveling 🙂

The thing I love about traveling solo is that I can become anyone I want to be. It allows me to challenge the limitations I may set for myself while I’m in the comforts of my own home. I can be an extrovert and meet lots of new people or be an introvert and have some recharge time on my own. I can try new activities/foods/fashions that I might have been intimidated by trying otherwise. I can try bartering in a market for a souvenir I really like (and if it doesn’t work at one stall, I can try again at another one!). I can also practice the local language and mess up without being embarrassed all while learning a better way to say something! There are so few opportunities in life where we really allow ourselves to try – fail/succeed – move on.

As for comfort zones, traveling solo pushes you each and every day in ways that you weren’t necessarily expecting. For example, I enjoy staying in hostels when I travel because I can meet other travelers, learn about new places to check out, tips on how to get somewhere and very likely, have someone to go out for a meal with. I don’t mind eating on my own but eating with new friends is always much more fun! The conversation can go on and on and you feel like you’re sitting at a table surrounded by the entire United Nations! I love that. How often does that happen at home? For me, not that often. One of the other ways hostels pushes me is by sharing a room with complete strangers. Note: hostels offer dorm rooms that include bunkbed style rooms and they also offer single en suite rooms. Throughout my trip I spent most of my time in a 4-person, typically female only, dorm room. It’s nice when the female option is available. Since I’m an incredibly light sleeper the chances of women snoring is less likely than being in a mixed co-ed dorm room. Sharing a room with people you don’t know can test your patience. Being able to adapt to your surroundings is a good way to challenge yourself for every area of your life!

Probably the thing that women fear most is traveling between places solo. Buying bus or train tickets, spending potentially hours on aforementioned transport – sometimes overnight – on your own. Yes, there are times where it can be intimidating or unnerving. I think it’s a good thing to be alert to your senses and your surroundings, especially as a woman. Listen to your gut and take heed when necessary. I find that when I’m on public transport, I will limit any kind of liquid intake throughout the morning and during the journey. I don’t know if it’s the right thing to do, it’s what I do. I only use the bathroom when absolutely necessary. I want to be near my personal items as often as possible. If I’m in an area that is dominated by men, I will look for a male traveler and if it feels right, introduce myself and ask if they mind if I hang out with them. If it’s a mixed group of people I survey the group and the person I’m sitting with and if comfortable, say hi to one or two people. I like connecting with people because if I do wander off to use the toilet or grab a snack, someone knows who I am and are more likely to recognize if I’m not there when I should be. I also like to be very aware of where my luggage is going when it’s out of my sight. If it’s under the bus, what compartment is it in? How many people have access to the luggage compartment? If my backpack/suitcase is stowed and I have the option, I will choose a seat on the bus/train on the same side my luggage is in. That way at stops I can see what is happening outside and if things look fishy, I am aware. In all the different types of transport I’ve taken around the globe, there were only 2 times where I really felt uneasy. One of those times I was able to buddy up with a couple of guys traveling and the other time I had a set of cheap speakers stolen out of my backpack. I’d say that’s pretty good luggage record.

To summarize, the things I find are most important for women who are traveling solo are:

• Connect with others – it’s nice to be kind and to a helpful way to stay safe
• Be anyone you want to be – try something new!
• Be adaptable and flexible – you left home for a reason 😉
• Listen and trust your gut – always

Like I said, these are things that work for me when I’m traveling solo. Everyone is different and everyone has their own level of comfort and that’s great. I hope that after your first solo trip when someone asks you “Aren’t you afraid?” you can confidently say “Of meeting someone like you? No way!”.

Happy and safe travels!

Do you travel solo too? What kind of tricks and tips do you use when you’re globetrotting? I’d love to hear them!